The Several Days of Sockmas: Days Eleven through Fifteen

On the first four days of Sockmas, my true love lavished me with teeny fulgent foliage, tasty oven baked goodies, a a wee little polar bear hiding in hand!

On the next five days of Sockmas, my true love lavished me with even more decadent goodies: toasty cartoon hand-snuggles, effulgent office trees and coruscating christmas boxes, smiles and yulebombs from across the oceans, and shiny new toenails after stolen moments with best friends. 


And my true love lalalalalala continues onwards!




On the Eleventh Day of Sockmas, My True Love Gave to Me... An office sleeping suite, happy hand toasters, office space aglowing, transatlantic sparkles, decked out toes a greening, huge Christmas boxes, bike part decor, midweek datenight fun, teeny tinsel tree, a delicata bake, and a polar bear in a pear tree



This morning I mounted the stairs with a fair bit more alacrity than yesterday's slumping stagger, unlocked the office door, turned on the Christmas lights and came into my office. There did I discover - my oh my - a brand new bedroom! Right next to my treadmill. With pillows and pink fluffy cloud nine comfort, all set up next to my snuggly office slippers! 

Now I could take this one of a few ways. First, I could assume that the mom-boss has installed this little addition in the hopes of squeezing every last minute of work from her industrious employees. Expand your office amenities and employees have that much less reason to go home. Second, I could guess that mom-boss has decided her associate was more than a little grumpy yesterday and needs a nap. Now when disagreements occur over trial strategy, mighty mom-boss can proclaim in both motherly and managerial timbre: "Go to your office! You need a time out!!"

Both are likely options, but I prefer to imagine that Santa Claus came by the office early. We did lay out plenty of mint chocolates and light up decorations for him. 

Regardless, it's just what I've always wanted! Napping after work is far too late in the day, and usually once I've returned home I have about 60-90 minutes to do absolutely every single chore I can possibly imagine so as to free up the rest of the evening to spend with my paramour. I've even tried laying down in the office before for a quick one, but it rarely seems to stick. 

Although my home-bed lacked the hostile incalescence of Tuesday night, I'm still adjusting to our unseasonably balmy evenings. The additional nap availability will not be unappreciated today. Also, it's one more excuse to never ever have consults or clients come in. I mean, at this point, it's less of an office than a home gym with access to work items. I pretty much work from home-away-from-home. And in fact h-a-f-h is even better than home-at-home because at home there are a million distractions and things that must be done. At the office, it's just work and work can always be ignored!


Like the Collaborative law minutes. Which I should have gotten out roughly two days ago. And which I had determined to do first thing upon arriving here. And yet there was a soft fluffy office-bed and suddenly, those minutes just seemed less important somehow! The hours either. Anything but slowly sinking down into the covers beneath my treadmill desk... hmmmm. 



On the Twelfth Day of Sockmas, My True Love Gave to Me... Dueling wreaths a wreathing, n office sleeping suite, happy hand toasters, office space aglowing, transatlantic sparkles, decked out toes a greening, huge Christmas boxes, bike part decor, midweek datenight fun, teeny tinsel tree, a delicata bake, and a polar bear in a pear tree




Just two days ago, Englettlaw finally replaced our autumnal leaf-wreath with a slightly more Christmassey affair. No, it doesn't sing "Walking in a Winter Wonderland" while releasing whiffs of peppermint toffee and mulled cider. I'm not sure it even qualifies as a wreath per se, being perhaps in the limbo land 'twixt wreath and garland. I would suspect that wreaths must in fact wreathe something. Our whatever-it-be has a decidedly non-circular feel. I dub it a post-modern re-wreathing deconstructivist reeth! 

But it does have a bit more of a seasonal feel to complement the little trove of treasures beyond our lobby door. Because we're both classy and deviously brilliant, our wreath-like-thing is actually. rigged through various over-the-door wiring mechanisms. Mostly phone cords tied in complicated enough configurations to approximate the appropriate height for our little Christmas door thing. 

Of course, we cannot be the wreath-kings forever (with our half-wreathing wreath). As they always do, our office neighbors have seen our deconstructed post-modern non-wreath reeth and raised us a genuine pine forest replete with cones, ribbon and ornaments abounding. It's a bit leviathon, perhaps even a wee bit terrifying. But it does smell oh so good.

Walking into the office now we get an immaculate progression of scents. First the redolence of pine trees, and old town home Christmases past etc. And then, as I open the door to Englettlaw proper, an olfactory tintinnabulation of Hershey's peppermint bells! I have no idea why the peppermint smells so deliciously pungent, but my how it does. I have a very small candy bowl of bells and creme de menthe kisses atop the secretary by the door (the furniture, not any employee). And the remaining bags of each are in the body of the secretary (again, furniture, not employee on a candy binge). Oh how it reeks of chocolate and mint. The heady scent causes me to pause in revelry before slowly advancing into the bowels of the office itself. 

Today is Friday and two weeks from now, Christmas shall have been feted. Of course, we'll first call the 12 days of Christmas. And then however much longer until Epiphany before we curtail our celebrations!

Let the classical KingFM Christmas Channel blare with guitar instrumentals of the Nutcracker suite! It's on, baby! Bring on the mad shopping (and taser)



On the Thirteenth Day of Sockmas, My True Love Gave to Me...Merry Medusoza, Dueling wreaths a wreathing, n office sleeping suite, happy hand toasters, office space aglowing, transatlantic sparkles, decked out toes a greening, huge Christmas boxes, bike part decor, midweek datenight fun, teeny tinsel tree, a delicata bake, and a polar bear in a pear tree





'Tis the weekend of decking the smeg out of any and all remaining halls that have henceforth remained unscathed. I am preparing myself mentally for a battle with my father's old Victorian palace and all its vintage adornments later today. Usually I have to nag him to no end to get these decorations out of their dusty spot in the attic. Last year, Andrew and I actually snuck over to his house while he was out of town and bedecked the place to within an inch of its life. Apparently, this year there's a party at his house. Suddenly, I'm just invited to "help" decorate. I'll take it! Although my father has been reporting various symptoms of a nasty GI virus that I'd just as soon not get. Gloves, masks, and a very merry red and green hazmat suit might be making an appearance. 

In the spirit of the weekend, I finally broke out the rest of our paltry piffle of ornamentation. Mainly the lights. Since I don't do anything as involved as planning when it comes to Christmas-caparison, they go wherever they'll stay. Which leads to um a style of hackneyed, er "intuitive" decorative panache best described as spontaneous. Possibly with a side of pulchritudinous pell-mell. Since there aren't many nails around, I mostly just alternated between window latches, door knobs, and curtain cords. But the light fixture itself provided a bit of an opportunity for something more. Mostly a big unearthly yuletide jellyfish I believe. Works for me!

I suspect we'll be a little more calculated this afternoon. There may be diagrams. If not, at least it's well known exactly where everything will go because it has always gone there since the dawn of Yuletide. 



On the Fourteenth Day of Sockmas, My True Love Gave to Me...Ornamental laundry, merry Medusoza, Dueling wreaths a wreathing, n office sleeping suite, happy hand toasters, office space aglowing, transatlantic sparkles, decked out toes a greening, huge Christmas boxes, bike part decor, midweek datenight fun, teeny tinsel tree, a delicata bake, and a polar bear in a pear tree




Decorating at Papa T's was a rapid success (blitzkrieg for 45 minutes and then lots of laying around while my very ill father continued to vacuum and futz and otherwise not stay still). We even got ornamental gifts out of the deal. Apparently my sister and her boys got to pick their own Hawaiian shirt ornaments before us (I'm so hurt to be last place). Braden decided that he wanted to take his off the hanger. Apparently, this destroys the ornament and the full hour of craftsmanship that each ornament requires. Ah well. Even if we got last pick, I like my bright Fauvist little shirt. And Andrew's florals suit him well. I think they look rather nice hanging like laundry from my makeshift light wires. 

I'm just about off for a tango with massage assassin. I've got all kinds of landmines for him to discover today. Wish us both luck!



On The Fifteenth Day of Sockmas, My True Love Gave to Me...Family photo deluge, Ornamental laundry, merry Medusoza, Dueling wreaths a wreathing, n office sleeping suite, happy hand toasters, office space aglowing, transatlantic sparkles, decked out toes a greening, huge Christmas boxes, bike part decor, midweek datenight fun, teeny tinsel tree, a delicata bake, and a polar bear in a pear tree




I have been trusted with the awesome responsibility of distributing all relevant photo packets to the friends and fans of the Falconer family. It truly is a herculean task, and one which I cannot take lightly. For one, you add all those school photos and photo calendars together in a single bag and the weight adds up! For another, well, it wouldn't be Christmas without the Falconer family photo drop with complimentary 2015 calendar. The initial calendar review for photos of oneself, for instance... now that's more yuletide than eggnog. There is, incidentally, one photo of me in the calendar. I look less exhausted and terrified than some of the years previous, although I am making a funny face while at the horrors that are the Rainforest Cafe! 

But in this case, it is not merely the photos or the photo of the photos that ought be featured: a shout out must go to the object photographing the photos. I got myself a new Samsung Galaxy S5! Actually, I purchased this as an upgrade gift for myself around Black Friday. However, I am a wee spell dilatory when it comes to gratification. My original plan had been to wrap it under the tree as a gift to myself, but it turns out the mail in rebate only applies if you activate the phone on or before Christmas. And activation sometimes doesn't run so smoothly. So after further capering cunctation, I managed to get enough information, time and energy to make a phone call, turn off my old phone, and turn on my new one!

Truly exhausting work. Of course, now there will be hours of tinkering to re-orient my apps and notifications to the perfect balance of before. But so far, I'm happy with the switch and feel that it is not too drastically novel over all. The idle battery life seems far superior, which is a pretty huge one. 

And after a wild weekend of phone updating and decorating, I'm back at the office. The cleaner had the gall to fold up my office-nap-space and put it on the table. Then she closed the office window. Just because it's 30 degrees out? Pshaw. We have previously asked her to leave it open. It gets incalescent in here without that, and the window is quite difficult to open once it's been shut. I had to stand on a low bookcase to get the proper leverage. 

After fixing up her horrible mess, I managed to complete the circle and kill my only plant. I say I pulled the plug, but really perhaps when I tell people that I have a black thumb, I just mean that I'm kind of planticidal. A client gave each of us plants about a month ago. For reasons utterly unknown to man or beast, mine thrived, while the other two wilted. It continued to blossom and bloom until the pot was far too small. Meanwhile Leslie was obsessively tending to the other two with clippers and hot water bottles and castor oil (ok not sure about that, but something like that) in the hopes of saving them. 

Then about a week ago, it was a rather gusty day (and my windowwas open). When I came into the office, I realized that my plant had taken a lover's leap off the window sill and strewn its soil about the floor. I called it lost, but since it was still more or less intact, I moved it into mom-boss' office just in case Leslie or my mother wanted to nurse it back to health. Nobody bit and the plant was still hanging on, albeit poorly. So this morning - gasp - I composted it. This is a disturbing trend. Tossing plants, offloading wild kitties to my mother's house... ah well. No comment. 

The office doesn't need a plant anyways. Far too dangerous in here with all the cleaning supplies and wind gusts. 

Happy Monday all! May your last full week before the big X-mas be merry, bright, full of parties, or at least mercifully fast and quiet. 
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